Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired

I've felt crappy for about two months now.

I have some sort of respiratory thing going on.  I saw my primary care provider about a month ago, at which time I'd been sick for a month already.  She diagnosed me with seasonal allergies, but I don't think that's the problem.  She prescribed something for me for allergies, and I've been taking it for a month, and I still have the same symptoms.  I have pain and pressure in my sinus areas and a sore throat and sometimes I  have a cough.  I am also tired and achy.

Of course, I'm pretty much always tired since I sleep so poorly, but I think I'm more tired than usual lately.

Today, I had planned to run some errands.  But I just didn't have enough energy.  I lay on the couch and dozed all afternoon instead.  I managed to take a shower.  That's about all I've done so far today.

My back has also been hurting for quite a while now.  I've been out of pain medication for a long time now, I forget exactly how long, but it hurts and I don't have meds for it.  Tylenol does nothing for my back pain and I might smack the next person that suggests I take some.

I realize the logical solution would be to see my doctor.  But due to my anxiety and PTSD and everything, that's not really an option.  I'm too anxious to drive to the Cleveland Clinic to see the back specialist and try to talk him into giving me more Vicodin.  I'm too anxious to go back to my primary care provider and try to convince her I don't have allergies, I'm really sick, and need antibiotics.

I'm frustrated because I feel certain that I'd feel about a million times better if I just had some antibiotics and some Vicodin.  But I can't get either of those things.  I'm a big believer in alternative medicine, but I've tried all the alternative stuff I know about and it hasn't worked in this instance.  I keep thinking the respiratory thing has to clear up eventually on its own, even without antibiotics.  But when?  It's been too months.  It's wearing me down.

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